My Good Humor Page - The Certain Things in Life 

The madam opened the brothel door to see a frail, elderly gentleman.  "Can I help you?" the madam asked.

"I want Natalie," the old man replied.

"Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies, perhaps someone else..."

"No, I must see Natalie."

Just then Natalie appeared and announced to the old man that she charges $1,000 per visit.  Without blinking, the man reached into his pocket and handed her ten $100 bills.  The two went up to a room for an hour, whereupon the man calmly left.

The next night he appeared again demanding to see Natalie.  Natalie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row and that there were no discounts...it was still $1,000 a visit.  Again the old man took out the money, the two went up to the room, and an hour later he left.

When he showed up the third consecutive night, no one could believe it.  Again, he handed Natalie the money and up to the room they went.   At the end of the hour, Natalie questioned the old man, "No one has ever used my services three nights in a row.   Where are you from?"

The old man replied, "I'm from Philadelphia."

"Really?" replied Natalie. "I have family who lives there."

"Yes, I know," said the old man. "Your father died, and I'm your sister's attorney. She asked me to give this $3,000 to you."

Moral of the story.  Some things in life are certain: taxes, death and being screwed by an attorney.

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