My Good Humor Page - You Know You're from Texas, if...

• You measure distance in hours.
• You've had to switch from "heat" to A/C" in the same day.
• Stores don't have bags, they have sacks.
• Stores don't have shopping carts; they have buggies.
• You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it, no matter what time of the year.
• You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I am fixing to go to the store.
• All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, or animal.
• You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
• You carry jumper cables in your car .....for your OWN car.
• You know what "snipe hunting" is all about.
• You only own four spices: salt, pepper, cayenne pepper and salsa.
• You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
• You think sexy lingerie is a tee shirt and boxer shorts.------ OH YEAH!!! :-)
• The local paper covers national and international news on one page but requires six pages for high school sports.
• You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
• You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
• You find 98 degrees F "a little warm."
• You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer, and Christmas.
• You know whether another Texan is from southern, middle, or northern Texas as soon as they open their mouth.
• There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 or more.
• Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past-time known as "goin' wal-martin" or off to "Wally World."
• You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.
• A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop.  It's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor.
• You understand these jokes and forward them to your friends from Texas!!

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