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Chris Good Humor Page - The current thinking of today's liberal Democrat
The AIDS virus is spread by a lack of funding.
Trial lawyers are selfless heroes, but doctors are overpaid.
Global temperatures are affected more by Yuppies driving SUV's than by cyclical, documented changes in the brilliance of the sun.
Guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than nuclear weapons in the hands of the Red Chinese.
Businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
Self-esteem is more important than doing anything to earn it.
There was no art before federal funding.
The NRA is bad, because it stands up for certain parts of the Constitution, but the ACLU is good, because it stands up for certain parts of the Constitution.
Taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
Harriet Tubman, Cesar Chavez and Gloria Steinem are more important to an understanding of American history than Thomas Jefferson, Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.
The most troubling thing you can find in a public school is children praying.
Standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas aren't.
Any change in the weather is proof of global warming.
National wealth is determined by what we consume, not by what we produce.
The only wars in which America should become involved are those in which the national security is not at risk.
Perjury and obstruction of justice are impeachable crimes if a Republican president like Richard Nixon commits them, but harmless private matters when committed by a Democratic president like Bill Clinton.
The way to end racism is to give people special treatment on the basis of their skin color.
We can have a strong military without spending any money on it.
The way to improve public schools is to give more money and power to people who have misused it in the past.
Hunters and fishermen don't care about nature, but pasty-faced activists who rarely leave the Upper West Side of Manhattan do.
A bureaucrat living in Washington can make better decisions about how your money should be spent than you can.
Hillary Clinton is a strong example for young women of feminist independence because everything she's gotten in her life is a result of her marriage to her husband.
Being a movie star makes you qualified to speak out on public policy.
A handful of religious wackos living in isolation in rural Texas are more of a threat to public safety than Puerto Rican terrorists who plant bombs in major cities.
Cigarette and liquor advertising must be banned, because it causes kids to smoke and drink, but we don't need to worry about sex and violence in television programming because kids aren't influenced by what happens between the commercials.
Passing new laws is a better way to prevent crime than enforcing existing ones.
The only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it has been tried is because people like you haven't been in charge.
So, doesn't that make you just love liberals?
I believe the jack-ass is a very appropriate symbol of the
democratic party. But have you heard, that the Democratic Party is changing
their mascot/symbol? Yeah,
read about it here.
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